Meditation, My Long-Lost Lover
How I reconnected with the one that got away…
It was the summer of 2020. You remember 2020, right? Toilet paper. Sour dough bread. Isolation.
For some, it has been a time to contemplate the abyss. For others, it’s been a time to work on the self.
Always one to pursue health and fitness, I decided to try boxing. Not in a ring against an opponent. But rather in my backyard punching a freestanding heavy bag.
At first, I watched YouTubes with super-buff trainers calling out ‘Jab- Left hook- Right — Upper Cut- Cross!’ but quickly my multi-tasking brain wanted more. Why couldn’t I exercise and read (listen to audio books) at the same time?
I listened to affirmations by motivational author Louise Hay. After all, during the early days of the pandemic, I think we all needed some positive words and reflections to bolster the courage to walk into a grocery store.
And then I remembered Wayne Dyer.
Didn’t I know you in high school?
It was the summer of ‘76. I had just graduated from high school and was planning to study English and Journalism at the University of Massachusetts in Amherst.
Dr. Wayne Dyer’s debut book and soon to be New York Times bestseller, Your Erroneous Zones, had just been published. Dyer appeared on The Mike Douglas Show, an afternoon staple on the family TV. I remember thinking, “He doesn’t look like a shrink.” His wild hair. His crazed eyes. His infectious excitement.
But I went off to college.
Dyer went off to parent eight children, write thirty-seven books, six children’s book, a novel, take part in thirteen television programs — many used as fundraisers on PBS. He also wrote and starred in the movie The Shift.
Meditation, did you ask me out then? If you did, I didn’t pay attention. I was young, easily distracted, and there was so much to do. You were a little too different for my tastes. And you spoke an unfamiliar language sometimes uttering those silly words — ‘om’ and ‘ah’?
Fast forward to 1998- we meet again.
I was a young mother trying to launch and maintain a home sewing business. My husband and I worked together. He installed the draperies, roman shades, and swags and jabots that I, and my team, made in a renovated barn behind our house.
One day, we received a glossy catalog of self-help cassette tapes in the mail from Nightingale-Conant. Always yearning to improve, I eagerly flipped through the pages.
Maybe it was name recognition, maybe it was the face, maybe it was just kismet, but I noticed Dr. Dyer’s series The Secrets of Manifesting Your Destiny. The company offered a 30 money-back guarantee, so I figured, “What have I got to lose?” I filled out the form, mailed my check, and waited for the LP sized plastic binder to arrive.
When it did, I immediately dug in to the program, popping the cassette into my ‘Walkman’ so I could listen to the tapes while I went for my daily walks. (My penchant for multi-tasking goes way back.)
Remembering our first meeting over two decades before, this cassette series felt like going to a reunion and meeting up with a friend. Dyer’s voice echoed in the headset. His words cajoled me to try Meditation.
A short-lived, half-hearted attempt at dating the ‘navel gazer.’
Dyer’s program suggests an aural meditation. Uttering the word ‘ah’ in the morning and ‘om’ in the evening would miraculously fulfill my destiny and attract all that I desired.
I tried. But never with too much commitment.
I feared what my family would think. I doubted the actual benefits of meditation. I gave it a half-hearted try, but I put it aside rather quickly.
You remember what it’s like when you date someone new? There are periods of wide-eyed wonder when everything looks magnificent, but then you question their motives. Or you decide you cannot tolerate their dining habits, or their personality. Before the relationship has even started, you decide to walk away. Isn’t it better to cut the ties than to continue with something that doesn’t quite satisfy?
I put the tapes away. I didn’t send them back, although I thought about it, but I think I had just passed the thirty days return period. They sat on a shelf for years. When we got around to spring cleaning one summer, the library would not even accept them. “No one listens to cassettes anymore. Now if they were CDs. We’d love to have those.”
At that point, Meditation would not steal me away from my current life. We just didn’t connect. The affair did not last — our love affair ended before it even began.
Didn’t we know each other in high school?
In the summer of 2020, I was reunited with Dyer’s calm voice, his wisdom, his life’s work. As I punched and kicked at the heavy bag, I listened to several books tape. Excuses Begone. Wishes Fulfilled. Real Magic. And once again, The Secrets of Manifesting Your Destiny.
And then I noticed my old friend Meditation. Huh!
What did I have to lose? After all, we’ve actually known each other for a very long time. There’s that shared background and history. There’s comfort in seeing old classmates who know the same dumb stories.
I listened to ‘Meditation Music by Dr. Wayne Dyer.’
Twenty minutes in the morning.
Twenty minutes before sleep.
In the morning, I drink my coffee and I pet my cat.
In the evening, I dream about the morning coffee and I pet my cat again.
In the morning, my mantra is ‘attract.’
In the evening, my mantra is ‘gratitude.’
Through my relationship with Meditation, the changes and benefits have been miraculous.
I’ve met the best people from all over the country and all over the world.
I wrote three books — one novel and two self-help books.
I started a creativity coaching business that I dreamed of launching for over twenty years.
People across the country and around the world have attended my creativity workshops.
It makes me wonder — ‘What if I had accepted Meditation’s proposal back in high school? Where might we be today?’
But I don’t regret any of it.
Instead of following that path back then, my life went down a different path.
I started writing a weekly column in my local newspaper. Because of that, I applied to an MFA program to pursue a Master’s Degree in Creative Writing. Because of that, I earned a position to teach at a college. Because of that, I have met hundreds and hundreds of young people whom I have taught and who have taught me.
Two years ago, I earned my doctorate. A lifelong dream.
But now, if 2021, I’m thrilled that I got a second chance with Meditation.
And I think we’ll stay together for a long, long time.
Your perfect match could be one of Meditation’s many siblings and friends.
There is nothing quite like rekindling an old love with an old flame.
There’s a sense of familiarity and history that cannot be ignored.
But if you have no previous connection with Meditation, consider taking the plunge today. See what’s out there. Speed date a few different methods and styles.
I must admit, I was self-conscious at first. I wondered what my family would think of me. But the ego is a nasty little monster that often subverts our finding wonderful and fulfilling experiences. And in the end, for me, no one really cares or will pass judgement on my attempts at silent contemplation.
In this new relationship, I wondered how I would make the time. But the one thing that many of us gained from this past year of working from home is a skosh more free time each day.
I wondered if I could continue the practice. Like so many new relationships, it’s one thing to start… it’s quite another thing to continue. But it’s been seven months now. And truthfully, I cannot imagine giving up on Meditation.
So what do you say? Wanna meet the perfect partner?
Take a chance on Meditation.
